My mom died in August of 1973. By the end of that year, my dad was remarried. Let that sink in… just less than five months…
There was hardly time to mourn. How DOES a child do that anyway? Is it important to keep traditions…Or is it wise to change things up? Is it a good idea to share stories… Or should we avoid “living in the past”?
After my dad married, it quickly became evident that sharing stories was not a good idea. For what ever reason, the woman who married US could not handle hearing tales of our family’s life that included our mom. We were told that we were “living in the past”. In fact, any mention of life as it was before, resulted in a rather large tantrum…that could last for days.
It didn’t take long for us to learn. Oh, someone would slip up every once in a while. Of course, it was thought to have been done on purpose. At least on my end, it wasn’t. I gave up most of the memories I might have had of my mother for this woman. That’s a lot to ask, no? I learned too late, it wasn’t enough.
We’ll see where this takes us…
This is me 
Lisa, I’m so sad that this happened to you! I know what it was like for me to loose my parents as an adult of 36 & 46 years old. I just cannot imagine how devastating it can be for a young child. And back in the day, no one knew how cope with death, least of all how to help a child. As little conciliation as it may be, I’m sure it made you an awesome Mom! ❤ Geri
I know you well enough that I know some of your story and yet it breaks my heart to hear it again. Your mother was well worth remembering and it must have been intimidating for your dad’s wife to know that your mom was so important to all of you. I’m rather confident that even without the ability to share your memories, your mom is a big part of who you are.
Oh Lisa, yes I knew most of this, and as Susan said, it breaks my heart to hear it again. I can’t begin to image how you must have felt, first for him to marry that soon and then not be able to talk about your mother. I hope at some point you made the time to mourn your loss and I also hope that you enjoy all your memories of her.
My heart breaks for you. I’m not sure I could get through some days without the memories I have of and with my mom. Thankfully for us both we have/had superhuman fathers, for whatever that is worth.